English! Do you speak it, motherfucker!?

Departure time: 09:33

Lenght: 3.81 miles

Time: 1"28"59

Number of steps: 6 400 (Exact. I didn't mean to though.)

Weather: Sunshine. Basically lovely.

Clothes: Fox Racins-shoes, black Nike-sweatpants and a black Happy Pill-t-shirt.

Weights: 2.2 lb on each extremity. A total of 8.8 lb extra.

In honor of my brothers visiting Canada this week, Im gonna write some blogs in english, so that the two canadians I actually know can take part in the (not so) great experience that is The Fat Rockstar.

So Shawn and Camara, tag along for a walk around Gotemburo in el Sweden änna. =)

Well. Out I go. The "Russian Route" was the chioce of the day. Felt like rediscovering another side of the city. Along the way I found a couple of typical swedish things.

First off, I found a swedish car. It's not correctly parked, which can be explained by the fact that swedish cars dont have streering wheels. Or, if you will, they ARE one big steering wheel. Made of wood. Controlling them is difficult. Requires 4 years of driving lessons. And 16 years of wheight-training.

That's why they dont sell.

At all.

Yes, this is a 2007 Saab.

Then, I stumbled across a swedish playground for children under the age of 3. Thing is, the swedish government cooperates with swedish soccer-fans and hire them as playground-constructors. Which basically means they burn something to the ground. And then we let small children play there. Makes hard fucking kids that grow up to become soccer-fans.

Circle of life, in Gotemburgo in el Sweden änna.

And yes, the vehicle is a 2006 Saab. (Like I said: they dont sell. At all.)

And now for something VERY swedish. This occurs quite often in the suburbian areas surrounding Gotemburgo in el Sweden änna.

This is a couple of shopping-carts, involved in a complicated reproduction-act (they are wierd animals), tampering with an electrical cabinet. The actual purpose for this extreme behavior is yet to be found out, but scientists think it has something to do with Global Warming.

Of course.

And finally, I found an american car. This is a Dodge Viper. If you successfully park your Saab during a whole year, and it doesn't rain english lords (OR champagne) during this time, you will be awarded one of theese.

So, this is the only one in Sweden. (There is one more, but it's been converted into a shopping-cart and is nowdays located at IKEA in Älmhult in Småland.)

Does the complicated sex-act mentioned above have something to do with shopping-carts turning into Dodge Vipers and then turned back into shopping-carts? What does the shopping-cart used to be a Viper look like? Is it still a Viper? And has it been concieved through shopping-cart-sex close to, or INSIDE, electrical cabinets?

And what does this have to do with Global Warming?

The questions pile up. More to come.

Stay tuned.

Boom!